The Flack


Travis Cloke and Gary Pert Exchange Emails about that Car Park

Posted March 13, 2013 by Titus in Regular Items
Hummer_H2_black

This week, Collingwood fined Travis Cloke $1000 for repeatedly parking in CEO Gary Pert’s parking spot at the Lexus Centre over the course of a year. Here for the first time are the emails relating to this controversy.

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC:

Subject: Car Park

Hi mate

Not sure if you’re aware but the spot you parked in today was my reserved car park. No big issue, just wanted to let you know.

Thanks

Gary

 

To: Gary Pert

From: Travis Cloke

CC:

Subject: RE: Car Park

Sorry mate!

Was running late and just chucked the car in the first park I saw. Sorry!

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC:

Subject: RE:re: Car Park

Mate, a week ago you said it was a mistake. Now I find your car in my reserved spot again.

 

To: Gary Pert

From: Travis Cloke

CC:

Subject: RE:re:re: Car Park

Hi Gary

You sure it was my car?

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC:

Subject: Re:re:re:re Car Park

Yes. I know your car Travis. It’s a bloody Hummer! Not hard to miss! Knock it off.

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC: Nathan Buckley

Subject: !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Travis

Today I arrived for an important meeting only to find you’d taken my park. We’ve spoken about this and you promised to stop.

I’ve been pretty reasonable up until now but this is the last time. I’ve cc’d Nathan in to this email so he is aware of the issue.

I would never have pulled a stunt like this when I was playing footy.

Gary

 

To: Gary Pert

From: Travis Cloke

CC: Nathan Buckley

Subject: RE: !!!!!!!!!!!!

Gary,

It’s my understanding that there are no reserved spots. I can hardly be held responsible for arriving earlier than you.

Also who’d you play footy for?

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC: Nathan Buckley

Subject: RE:re: !!!!!!!!!!!

Listen mate, You know there are reserved car parks. That why there’s a sign on mine saying Gary Pert CEO.

I played for Collingwood and Fitzroy but that’s beside the point. STOP PARKING IN MY SPOT!!!

 

To: Gary Pert

From: Nathan Buckley

CC: Travis Cloke

Subject: RE:re:re: !!!!!!!!!!

Guys, I really don’t have time for this.

Travis, stop parking in Gary’s spot.

Gary, consider dialling down the exclamation points. I felt like I was reading One Direction’s fan mail.

Also Gary, what division of amateurs where those teams in?

NB

 

To: Nathan Buckley

From: Gary Pert

CC: Travis Cloke

Subject: RE:re:re:re: !!!!!!!!!!

Nathan, I played with you at Collingwood. Are you serious? It’s so hard to pick up tone in an email. Actually its hard to pick your tone in person.

Travis, you’ve heard the coach. This ends now.

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC: Nathan Buckley, Nick Maxwell, Scott Pendlebury, Luke Ball, Dayne Beams

Subject: First and final warning

Travis

I’m writing to you to put on the record an official warning for repeatedly parking in my reserved car park.

The leadership group have been copied in as I believe this issue strikes at the very heart of what this club is about.

Another incident will result in formal disciplinary action.

Gary

 

To: Gary Pert

From: Nick Maxwell

CC: Nathan Buckley, Scott Pendlebury, Luke Ball, Dayne Beams, Travis Cloke

Subject: RE: First and final warning

Hi Gary

Sorry, just to be clear, if I read your email right, the heart of what the Collingwood Football Club is about, is not parking in other people’s reserved car park spots?

Seems unlikely that this is what the biggest sporting club in Australia would be about. Let’s keep some perspective.

Travis, stop parking in Gary’s spot. He seems pretty upset.

Nick

 

To: Nathan Buckley, Scott Pendlebury, Dayne Beams, Travis Cloke, Nick Maxwell

From: Luke Ball

CC: Gary Pert

Subject: RE:re: First and final warning

I would have thought the Collingwood Football Club stood for stealing cars from reserved spots!

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Gary Pert

CC: Eddie McGuire, Nathan Buckley, Scott Pendlebury, Dayne Beams, Luke Ball, Nick Maxwell

Subject: Today and its consequences

Travis

Today I came in to work to find your car in my RESERVED car park again. As I’ve explained to you repeatedly, this is a serious issue. It has now been going on for over a year.

Earlier this month I gave you a first and final warning. This latest transgression cannot go unpunished.

I’ve cc’d the Chairman in and he and I have spoken. He expects the leadership to come up with a suitable punishment.

 

To: Nathan Buckley, Scott Pendlebury, Dayne Beams, Luke Ball, Nick Maxwell

From: Eddie McGuire

CC: Gary Pert, Travis Cloke

Subject: RE: Today and its consequences

G’day fellas

There seems to be a bit of unnecessary heat around this issue. It’s something I want sorted out.

Gary’s got every right to be annoyed about this. I tell you what, try parking in my car space. It wouldn’t last a bloody year. Dawes did that to me once and I knew it was an honest mistake. Still, enjoy playing at Melbourne buddy!

Anyway, I expect this sorted out fast. Not parking in someone else’s car park is at the heart of what the Collingwood Football Club stands for.

And let’s keep this quiet. If the media get a hold of this we’ll be a bloody laughing stock.

Gary/Travis, patch things up.

Travis, Gary is very important to this club – show some respect.

Gary, Try to cut Travis some slack, it would be hard for you to understand the pressure he’s under given you haven’t played at this level. This isn’t the bloody amateurs!

Not very happy!

Ed

 

To: Travis Cloke

From: Nick Maxwell

CC: Eddie McGuire, Gary Pert, Nathan Buckley, Scott Pendlebury, Dayne Beams, Luke Ball

Subject: Sanction

Travis

Not parking in someone else’s reserved car park is at the heart of what Collingwood Football Club stands for. We all know this.

Over the past year you have repeatedly ignored this central tenant.

On behalf of the leadership group, I am writing to inform you that you will be fined the maximum allowed under AFLPA regulations: $1000.

I sincerely hope this brings an end to this serious matter.

Nick

 

To: Nick Maxwell

From: Travis Cloke

CC: Eddie McGuire, Gary Pert, Nathan Buckley, Scott Pendlebury, Dayne Beams, Luke Ball

Subject: RE: Sanction

Fine.

Gary, there’s some loose change in the ashtray in my Hummer. There’s at least a thousand bucks in there, probably a bit more than that to be honest.

The keys are in my locker and the car is parked in that spot that has the sign that says, ‘Gary Pert CEO.’

Cheers Nick, fair cop, won’t happen again.

Travis

An Almost Accurate Press Conference with Majak Daw

Like Titus O’Reily on Facebook

More articles from Titus O’Reily

Titus is also on Twitter which he incorrectly thinks is part of  ‘the Socialist media’. Follow him to be mildly amused every so often.

The Flack also has a weekly ‘electronic mail’ which is sent through the ‘Information Superhighway’ and is a constant source of delight, so please subscribe.

Comments

comments


About the Author

Titus
Titus

Writer, political agitator and broadcaster, Titus O’Reily was born in May 1962. Abandoned by his parents within hours of his birth, Titus was raised by the Sisters of Collective Misery. Titus has risen to folk hero status amongst Australians due to his long running campaigns to lower the drinking age and prevent anyone entering Australia, including Australians returning from holidays. Titus is known as ‘the voice of Australia’s working class’, despite the fact he long lost touch with them and in the main, reality. He currently lives on a large farm with three sisters while writing for The Flack.


One Comment



Leave a Response

(required)